Prompt 10

     The worst ads that I have ever seen involving a sports players are the Nutrisystem commercials, which use retired NFL players to endorse their product.  Lawrence Taylor and Terry Bradshaw are two of the NFL players that Nutrisystem uses to endorse their products.  What makes this worse is that Lawrence Taylor is currently on six years of probation for having sex with an underage girl.  LT is definitely someone who I would want to endorse my product, and what I mean by that is what was Nutrisystem thinking when they decided to put LT in their commercial.  Also, it is obvious that this product does not work, and does not taste or look as good as Nutrisystem makes it out to be.  So the fact that NFL players are willing to lie, and say that this product helped them lose incredible amounts of weight is terrible.  My favorite ad that contains an athlete, does not endorse any company or product, but it makes fun of the commercials that United Way airs showing that NFL players are great humanitarians.  But, in this NFL spoof, Peyton Manning shows parents why they should spend time with their kids, so that they will not have to spend time with him.  There is one scene which shows Peyton playing the football with the kids.  One child goes out for a pass, and Peyton beans him in the back of the head with the football, and the boy instantly drops to the ground.  Then when the boy walks back into the huddle, Peyton tells him that he can't look at him right now and that "he sucks," and tell him to take a twenty minute timeout in the port-a-potty.  The next scene shows Peyton teaching the children how to break into a car, then they hear police sirens, and Peyton says, "Run! Cops! Every man for themselves!"  This is one of the best spoofs of a commercial or an ad that I have ever scene.  Every time I watch this, I cannot help but laugh.

Prompt 9

     I woke up at 7:00 AM...late as usual from a long night of partying.  I woke up with the worst hangover of my life, the world seemed so bright, as if the sun had somehow landed on the earth, making me unable to open my eyes, and my head was pulsating.  I had been too lazy to do laundry for the past month, which meant I had no clean clothes and I had been too lazy to go grocery shopping, so I had no food in my house.  I decided I would stop for a healthy breakfast at McDonalds on my way to work.  After picking up a sausage mcgriddle and a sweet tea, I headed to work.  Traffic was horrendous, it honestly probably would have been faster to walk to work than to drive the rest of the way.  Some jerk cut me off, and I flipped him the bird and threw the rest of my sweet tea onto his car as he drove by, as I nearly avoided a wreck with an oil truck.  I arrived at work in a happy mood, even though I was about an hour late, because I was able to get even with the jerk who cut me off and avoid death.  As I approached my desk there was a note to go see the boss.  I was estatic, I thought this would be when I would get the promotion that I had been waiting two years for.  I sprinted to my boss's office, and ran through the door with excitement, but then she told me she was busy and made me sit outside her office and told me that she would call me in in a bit.  Sitting outside her office, I couldn't hide my excitement, i had a grin from ear to ear.  After about two hours, she finally called me in her office, which was probably a good thing because any longer and my face may have turned into a permanent smile.  My boss greeted me and then handed me an envelope, and I thought to myself this was it, all my hard work was finally going to pay off.  I tore open the envelope and read what was enclosed.  While I was reading, she told me that my services were no longer needed and I was fired.  I couldn't believe what I had heard, I was the best worker in the entire office.  Suddenly I became furious, and started shouting expletives as I walked out her office and out of the building, gathering my belongings as I left.  I threw my things in my car, and began to drive home.  The drive home would have been quick because there was no traffic so I was going 120 miles per hour, but a cop suddenly pulled up behind me and put on his lights.  For some reason I thought it was a good idea to run from the cops, just like I done in the numerous video games I have played, I mean I was really good at video games.  But, I found out that evading the police was a lot harder to do in real life than in a video game, and the cops caught me within about a minute.  It wasn't a long chase, but you should have seen me out there, I looked like a NASCAR driver. I was arrested for going 50 miles per hour over the speed limit, and resisting arrest.  I am now in jail and unemployed.  But, the one good thing that happened was that I made it on television, on the show Worlds Dumbest Criminals, I guess my driving skills weren't that good after all.

Prompt 8

     My favorite sports movie is The Sandlot.  The Sandlot is a story of a group of boys who play baseball everyday.  Then one day one of the boys brings out his dad's Babe Ruth autographed baseball.  One of the boys hits a home run, but the ball lands over the wall of old appliances and in the backyard of an unknown old man.  This old man is thought to have a huge dog who attacks people.  The boys go on a mission to get the ball back, and after numerous attempts the boys finally get the ball back, and all is right on the sandlot.  This story has many things which fascinate people.  The boys' friendship is great, although they argue a lot, they never break apart, and always stay friends and help each other.  The boys are forced to overcome impossible odds.  The boys had heard numerous stories about how the old man and his dog would attack anyone who tried to go on their property, and to make the situation even worse, the wall which separated the field from the backyard had old appliances that were stacked extremely high.  Also, in this movie the boy who is extremely nerdy gets to kiss the best looking girl in the movie (granted it was because she was a life guard and she thought he was drowning and she gives him mouth to mouth to try and save him, but he turned it into a kiss nonetheless).  This movie also contains archetypes of characters which are very common in films, this movie contains the nerd and the good looking girl, as stated earlier, and this movie also contains the hero or the superstar.  One boy is the leader of the group, and he is the best baseball player out of all of them.  He takes it upon himself to get the baseball from the old man's yard, and works up his courage and gets the ball from the man's backyard.  To his friends he is a hero., because he was able to do the impossible.

Prompt 7

     My favorite "non-sports" film is The Hangover.  The Hangover is the story of four friends who travel to Las Vegas to celebrate their friend's bachelor party.  While in Las Vegas, one of the friends secretly gives all of his friends roofies so that way they would have a good time.  The friends wake up the next morning, and realize that they have lost their friend Doug, who is supposed to get married the next day.  The men go on a journey to find their lost friend Doug.  In the process, the men encounter Mike Tyson, Mike Tyson's tiger, a baby named Carlos, children who shoot them with tasers, an Asian man who jumps out the trunk of a car and beats the friends, and a drug dealer whose name is also Doug.  But, after about a day of searching for their friend, the friends find Doug on top of the roof of their hotel, and rush him back just in time for his wedding.  The theme of this movie is that friendship will prevail, and that friends (when they work together) can get through anything.   There are many parts of this movie, which throughout history have fascinated the American people.  One of these things are large animals.  In the Hangover, after the friends wake up from their night of partying, the friends find Mike Tyson's tiger in their bathroom.  Mike Tyson forces the men to bring the tiger back to his house, since they stole it from him the night before.  After knocking the tiger out with roofies, and bringing the tiger to their car, the tiger wakes up on the way to the house, clawing one of the friends, and destroying the interior of the car.  Another thing that Americans are fascinated with is violence.  In this movie there is a lot of violence, for example, Mike Tyson punches and knocks out one of the men, schoolchildren use tasers on the men to stun them, and the tiger claws one of the men.  These are only a few instances of violence in the Hangover.  These acts of violence appeal to the American people because most of the time they are portrayed in a funny manner.  The purpose of this movie is to humor its audience.  There may be some underlying purposes, such as showing that when friends work together they can accomplish anything, or not to take roofies because you won't remember anything the next morning.  But, the funniness and irony appeals to the American people, and allows people to forget about what is going on in their lives, and gives them the opportunity to genuinely be amused.